Congress Demands Investigation After Officers Report Being Told Trump Was Anointed by Jesus to Start Armageddon

More than two dozen Democratic members of Congress have formally requested an investigation into the Department of Defense after uniformed officers filed a complaint alleging that military commanders told them President Trump was “anointed by Jesus to light the signal fire in Iran to cause Armageddon and mark his return to Earth.”

Congress Demands Investigation After Officers Report Being Told Trump Was Anointed by Jesus to Start Armageddon

That sentence was written by congressional representatives, in an official letter, to the Secretary of Defense, about complaints from active-duty military officers. About their commanding officers. About the thing those commanding officers said.

The legislators want to know if the DOD is being used to advance a specific eschatological agenda. This is now a thing that legislators have to ask. They are asking it in writing. There is a paper trail.

It is worth pausing here to appreciate the extraordinary nature of what it means that “please investigate whether our military thinks it is participating in the literal biblical end times” is a request that had to be made formally, through official channels, by members of the United States Congress.

The investigation has been requested. Whether the DOD will investigate itself for believing it is enacting prophecy remains to be seen. Armageddon, traditionally, does not include a strongly worded oversight letter. But we live in novel times.

All of this actually happened. Military.com confirmed it.

Seven in Ten Americans Now Believe Trump Is Not Actually Religious, Up Eight Points Since He Started the Holy War

A new Pew Research Center survey finds that 70 percent of Americans believe Donald Trump is “not too” or “not at all” religious — a figure that has risen eight percentage points since fall 2024. This is notable on its own terms, but it becomes considerably more interesting when you consider that the same period covers an AI image of Trump as a Christ-like figure posted to his social media, a Secretary of Defense quoting scripture at Pentagon briefings, military commanders allegedly telling soldiers that Trump was anointed by Jesus to trigger the Apocalypse, and a formal fight with the Pope.

Somehow, all of this religious signaling has resulted in fewer Americans thinking Trump is religious. This is either a devastating indictment of the signaling strategy or a sign that the American public is quietly more theologically sophisticated than generally assumed. Possibly both.

The Daily Beast, in a piece published this year, argued that Trump’s “God-talk is actually turning America off religion” more broadly — that associating faith with political theater is causing people to reconsider the whole enterprise. NPR ran a piece titled “Christians are having a Trump-sized reckoning.” Conservative Catholics, according to Religion News Service, are becoming disillusioned at accelerating speed, particularly following the pope conflict.

In a stunning twist, the most effective argument against American theocracy may turn out to be watching someone attempt to build one in real time. File this under Rational Thought, with the caveat that we’re grading on a steep curve.

All of this actually happened. Pew Research confirmed it, and their methodology is above reproach.

Pope Leo Tells the White House: God Does Not Bless Wars. The White House Has Concerns.

In a move that would have seemed unremarkable in most of recorded history but feels somehow radical in 2026, the Pope said that God doesn’t bless wars. Specifically, Pope Leo wrote: “Woe to those who manipulate religion and the very name of God for their own military, economic, and political gain, dragging that which is sacred into darkness and filth.” He called for peace in the Middle East and insisted that “God does not bless any conflict.”

The White House, whose Secretary of Defense has been crediting divine providence with Iran war victories and quoting Psalms at press briefings, has not formally replied to the Pope’s theological position. This is not because they agree. CNN ran a piece on “the GOP’s double standard on the pope.” Analysis pieces appeared. Things were tense.

It is worth noting, for the record, that the leader of the Catholic Church — an institution with a complicated personal history on the subject of wars it has blessed — looked at the current situation and said, in so many words, “No. Stop. God is not doing this.” This constitutes, in the GCJ editorial view, an act of rational thought, however relative that designation has become.

The struggle between sacred and secular power is, as scholars note, roughly a thousand years old. It’s nice to see it’s still getting the attention it deserves in what used to be the news cycle.

We did not make this up. Middle East Eye has the receipts.

Pope Tells Pete Hegseth: God Is Not Listening to Your War Prayers, Actually

Pope Leo XIV, the first American pope and a Chicago-born Augustinian friar, has apparently been following the news. And he has some notes for Pete Hegseth.

Pope Tells Pete Hegseth: God Is Not Listening to Your War Prayers, Actually

During Palm Sunday Mass at St. Peter’s Square, the pope addressed — without naming names, though the names were very clearly named — the recent trend of invoking God’s favor for military violence. “Jesus, King of Peace, who rejects war, whom no one can use to justify war,” Leo said. “He does not listen to the prayers of those who wage war, but rejects them.” He added that God refuses the prayers of leaders who have “hands full of blood.”

This was delivered roughly five days after Hegseth held a Pentagon prayer service in which he asked God to deliver enemies to “eternal damnation” and ensure that every military round “find its mark.” The pope did not specifically mention Hegseth. He didn’t have to.

The spectacle of a Chicago man becoming pope and then immediately having to correct the U.S. Secretary of Defense’s theology is not something anyone had on their 2026 bingo card. And yet here we are, watching the Vicar of Christ deploy a Palm Sunday homily like a very pointed subtweet.

The pope also called on Trump to find an “off-ramp” to end the Iran war. The White House did not immediately respond.

All of this actually happened. PBS NewsHour confirmed it.

New York City Just Elected Its First Muslim Mayor and Some People Cannot Handle It

In November 2025, New York City — the largest city in the United States, home to 8 million people and approximately 400 different opinions per square block — elected 34-year-old Zohran Mamdani as its mayor. He is the city’s first Muslim mayor. Also its first South Asian mayor. Also a democratic socialist who beat both Andrew Cuomo and a guy named Curtis Sliwa in a high-turnout race.

NYC first Muslim mayor

The reaction from certain corners of the internet was, predictably, completely reasonable and measured. Just kidding. It was not.

Here’s the rational thought for the day: New York City has had 110 mayors. The first 109 were Christian men, almost entirely white. The city elected a Muslim mayor, and the government did not collapse. The Statue of Liberty is still there. The pizza is still good. The subway is still a disaster, but that predates Mamdani by several decades and will outlast all of us.

Democracy did a thing. A major American city chose someone different. Turns out the thing people said couldn’t happen — that a Muslim could run one of the world’s great cities — was just a thing people said. File under: Rational Thought.

Full coverage from Religion News Service.

8 Million People Said “No Kings” on the Day We Celebrate a Guy Who Rode Into Jerusalem to Say Exactly That

On March 28th — Palm Sunday, for those keeping score — an estimated eight million Americans took to the streets in what organizers are calling the largest single-day protest in American history. The protest was called “No Kings.”

8 million people No Kings protest Palm Sunday

Palm Sunday, in case you need the refresher, is the day Christians commemorate Jesus riding into Jerusalem on a donkey, specifically to confront the ruling political and religious establishment of his time. He was making a point. They crucified him for it five days later.

We’re not saying anything. We’re just noting the date.

The protests spanned all 50 states, plus Italy, France, Germany, and Spain. Demonstrators cited the Iran war, ICE enforcement operations, and the general vibe of watching democracy do something weird in slow motion. In West Palm Beach — Florida, naturally — Trump supporters showed up to clash with protesters, because of course they did.

Bruce Springsteen performed at the flagship rally in Minnesota. Because apparently even The Boss knows when it’s time to ride into Jerusalem.

The irony is almost too clean to be accidental. Eight million people, on the holiest week in the Christian calendar, marching under the banner of “No Kings” — echoing the words of a guy who got executed by an empire for doing exactly the same thing two thousand years ago.

Rational thought: sometimes it shows up on a Sunday, wearing sandals, riding a donkey.

All of this actually happened. Eight million people. Palm Sunday. Make of that what you will.

Total Eclipse 2017

With all the total bullshit we post and expose on this site, here’s a post about hard physical science.

I took my kids to Oregon to witness the total solar eclipse and it was spectacular. It is not really even describable and no picture truly does it justice. But, here’s picture I took anyway.

R.I.P. Robin Williams

As I sit here unable to sleep, again, I have finally realized that the death of Robin Williams has affected me more than I could have possibly imagined. And, it’s not because of the cause of his death. It’s because I never knew the man, but this event has cemented my definition of immortality.

Lauren Bacall passed away the next day, completing the latest “they come in threes”. And, why is it they come in threes? I can only imagine a couple versions Robin may have come up with:

  • [singing] Because one is the loneliest number…
  • It sure beats being #2 (yes, that’s a poop joke)
  • Because the celestial taxi system that ferries souls to heaven is having a fuel shortage, so they have to carpool. And, the first two get impatient real quick. “C’mon, fucking DIE already. St. Peter is waiting…I’m gonna miss my galactic neru massage! Hurry it up already!”

OK…that last one maybe a little more George Carlin. But, that’s where Robin took things and that’s why we laughed our asses off.

As a kid, I used to memorize Robins routines and perform them for my family. I am a decent mimic, and I would study his mannerisms and delivery. And, even as second hand, recycled comedy, his routines would bring the house down. I think I caused a few asthma attacks even.

I guess this is where I actually started to learn that knowing your audience is key, and that when appropriate, don’t hold back…speak what needs to be spoken…which is most of the time.

And, now I see all these celebrities being interviewed and they have nothing but glowing remembrances of Robin. Jeff Bridges, who starred with Robin in The Fisher King actually took several minutes at the big press panel for his new movie to remember his time with Robin. Watching him turn around and look at Meryl Streep and fondly recall Robin dragging his ass on the ground in Central Park at 4am saying “You know why dogs do this? Because they can!” was incredible. And, over his other shoulder was Taylor Swift with a look like “I am never ever ever ever doing a press panel with this guy again.” (if you get that joke then good for you.)

Someone in New York should organize this as an annual event. The annual “Robin Williams Because They Can Central Park Naked Ass Drag.” How awesome would that be to see 100,000 people all dragging their asses like dogs in the grass.

It reminded me of my Grandfather’s funeral…not the naked ass dragging (seriously…you thought those two were connected…what’s wrong with you?)…the people all coming out with amazing remembrances. I was a teenager, and to me a funeral was a family thing. And, then all these people showed up. And, I thought, uh…my family isn’t that big…or someone’s been lying to me. But, there they were. People I had never seen before in my life that all knew and or were touched by my grandfather in some way (not like that…get your head out of the gutter).

And, now Robin. People he didn’t even know, like me, are talking about how he touched them. Assuming that you aren’t a complete douche bag, you attempt to make your mark on this world while hopefully leaving it a slightly better place. If you are a total douche, please just leave…now…go…I’ll wait.

Robin made the world a better place. Dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, he walked into a sex shop and tried to buy a double headed dildo…just because. He made us look at the world around us with a slightly different perspective…warped…or not. He made us laugh.

THAT is immortality.

Thoughts on the US Election

First…hell yeah baby!! In the words of my 3 year old son, “Obama Rocks”.

It really is amazing what happens when enough people get motivated and pissed off. The only thing that is really annoying me about this election is why did it take so damn long? Everyone knew that Shrub Jr. was a dip-shit 4 years ago when Gore “won”. How is it that we could collectively let that man stay in power for 8 years?

He put the economy in the crapper, put the country to war without really using the proper constitutional channels, created a new government office that can infringe on the civil liberties of the citizens…WTF?!

Well, now Obama is in office, and he’s not wasting any time sending messages that things are going to change. For the first time in a while, I’m excited about the future of our country if for no other reason than other countries are now openly expressing interest in renewing relationships that Bush tarnished.

What does this have to do with deities and food items? Nothing…but this is my web site, so if you don’t like it, go make your own site.

Supreme Griller.

An Unlikely Explanation

From random web browsing comes this funny explanation:

Last week, Mordechai Coheni, assembling a falafel, noticed skillet burns on the pita resembling the face of Jesus Christ. Shortly thereafter, 8,000 curious pilgrims trek to the falafel stand in Jerusalem to view the sacred icon.
“Why is this a surprise?”, asked Dolores del Rios, a pilgrim from Spain. “Jesus was a Jew- he probably grew up eating pita. He is probably more comfortable appearing on a pita than a tortilla.”

I can’t exactly call this “rational” thought, but it is showing “some” thought… and it did strike me as very funny.